One of my friends says my thoughts are like my house – a disaster area. Seriously.

As funny as it is, she didn’t say it as a joke. It was a hard, cold fact.

I hope you have a friend who’s willing to get down in the muck of your house and my mind. The truth is there’s a lotta of work to do.

On both.

Most of us do, more or less.

You know there are some friends who speak the truth even if you don’t like it. That’s why they are called friends.

Hopefully you have people that  you trust.

My friend, let’s call him JJ, he’s a coach, he has been through a ton, He’s been on the top and he’s been rock bottom. He’s got children they just turned 15.

I remember when they were born and prayed for him. A lot of people did.

He’s reinvented himself probably a dozen times. He’s on the verge of exploding with a project that will last long beyond him and will open doors to a lot of overlooked people.

It already has. If I told you, I’m sure you’d know their names.

He has given me advice I didn’t like – a lot. Not sure I told him either.

But I didnt see the facts, through my emotion.

He’s become a philosopher of sorts. And, he’s not typically wrong, I’ve come to note.

He said the other day:

If I care about you, I have to make you conscious of things you don’t see —

mY FRIEND “JJ”

That’s to say, I love you enough to make you mad. I am invested enough make you see the reality. I have to shake your personal perceptions to make you uncomfortable to make you better. You know, get your butt out of its comfort zone.

*You can’t love someone if you don’t speak the truth.

*You don’t love them, if you aren’t speaking the truth.

*It’s not being nice, it’s prolonging their frustration, maybe their pain, but it’s not helping. 

*It’s cotton candy to the starving

*It might  not be lying, but it lives in the same subdivision.

It’s described in the Johari Window –  It’s your blindspot… Look it up. It’s  fascinating. 

The Johari Window

I guess this is the point. Of ALL of this. You don’t know that you don’t know.

You need people who do, and you HAVE to listen.

So swallow your pride, again. I know I have to.

Again.

This has one of the best years of my life, its also been one of the hardest as the spotlight of truth gets pointed into my darkest spots.

Spots that I could keep hidden from some but not the people who care about me most.

Like I said before, I’m digging in. I’m not smart enough to do it alone.